What just happened?!?

Welcome to the middle of the story.

Life is messy. Life is hard. Life is glorious and grandiose and full of shit that happens and times that may bore us to tears. Whatever your life is, mine went completely insane.

As I was contemplating a rebirth, a renewal, a re-energizing of my personal life in Northern California, I found out I was pregnant. (This was early Spring 2014.)  Dang it! I thought I was DONE with the whole birth world and babies and diapers and that whole "no sleep" thing! AND I was away from my support system! This is probably what scared me the most. My parents and In-laws were 3,000 miles away.

Please do not get me wrong: this pregnancy was certainly NOT according to OUR plan; but was this child unwanted? ABSOLUTELY NOT!! This was certainly God's Child. From that point on, I had to put "my plans" on hold and let God have a turn at the wheel. Once the pregnancy was confirmed, I knew I had to find a support system: birth team, church, friends. For an introvert, this was going to be tough!

In December 2013, we moved into a small 120+ year old house in the second floor unit near downtown Petaluma, CA. It was within walking distance of anything we needed! A small Whole Foods was half a block away. A Target, Sprouts, and surrounding shopping center was four or five blocks east of us, while beautiful, downtown historic Petaluma was about a mile west of us. Should you ever wonder, "Petaluma. Should we stop and check it out?" You need to answer, "YES!" It is full of cute little shops for everyone! Loads of restaurants and snack stops, a yarn shop, several well-stocked thrift stores, a natural toy store in the theater district, a well-stocked candy store, and tons of historical architecture! A majority of these buildings were from before the 1906 San Francisco earthquake. Walnut Park is a great little park with a playground that the girls liked located on the south end of downtown. And look up the long list of movies that were shot in and around Petaluma over several decades! ( here, here, and here )

Our location was fantastic. We found a church relatively close in town called 360 Church of Petaluma.  It was a non-denominational Christian church that felt relaxed, and the girls felt comfortable in their children's programs. This one was full of real people. Thank God!

I started interviewing local midwives. Found two that were about to start their own birth center in a town about 30 minutes north of us. It was a beautiful option! Luckily, they agreed to come do prenatal checkups at our place in Petaluma as we only had one car that my husband took to work an hour south of us.  They attended the homebirth of our son and third child, Wolfgang, in October of 2014. With Hypnobabies home study and their hands-off assistance, this birth was by far the best experience I ever had! My little family was there and Daciana got to hold his hand as he was laying on my belly short after birth. It was beautiful....and another post....

Friends. Having to put on my big girl panties and get out there to meet people - all while managing two growing kids, a tiny home with less than desirable neighbors, a pregnancy that was sucking any energy out of me, later deciding to put the girls into a Waldorf Charter school three blocks away - was more than a daunting task, it was MONSTROUS. Quite leviathan in nature. Jonah's Whale had eaten me alive and spat me on foreign shores.

Ultimately, I did find wonderful friends. Some in the Women's Group at the church. Some I found at a newly formed crafting group that met in various places around town, The Rebel Craft Collective  (Meetup). I even made friends with a couple of Moms at the school (Live Oak) that the girls started attending...we referred to ourselves as Misfit Moms (the three of us were not NorCal natives and never seemed to fit in with the "kool-aid drinkers". Several other people were miraculously scattered around town or my husband's workplace. Also found an excellent chiropractic practice within walking distance of our little place; Praise the Lord!

Insanity runs in my family. Shortly after we moved to NorCal, my parents bought an RV and followed us out, if not forever, but seasonally. They were able to make it for the girls' birthdays, some holidays, and shortly after the birth of our son (little stinker came a couple weeks early). It was an absolute blessing that they were able to make it out!

So...What happened?!? We stayed in NorCal (this is the short version of the story) for almost three years. We made very good friends. Whether it is Wanderlust, Humor of the Universe, or ultimately God's Plan, our souls still haven't settled down. We made it back to Florida and are currently in the Orlando area nearer to our family and original support group. The strong desire for Wolfgang to grow up with TWO sets of awesome grandparents and our adult need to be able to financially support our family (it is CRAZY expensive in California!!) brought us back.

We love our friends on both coasts! We miss everyone. We are thankful for social media to keep in touch. God is good all the time; and all the time, God is good.

The adventure continues.....!

Re-Purpose

Contemplating a new look, a nickname, a profession.....what about dark blue/purple/steak of dark pink short hair, call myself Raven, and be a photographer?

Or what about short blond hair, Daisy, and be a writer?

How about short brown hair, Rainbow, doula?

But I'm too lazy...I will probably just leave my sandy blond hair alone, listen to my children yell Mama and keep being a Mom....

I hope I can find a bicycle soon....and perhaps a bike trailer. I gotta go search Craigslist now...

Rebirth

We have moved. Again. The third time in two and a half years.

No, we are not a military family. Far from it! I like to hug trees and make granola.

My wonderful husband got his dream job. Finally. After ten plus years of trying and waiting. After so many times hearing "No", someone finally said, "YES!"

OH JOY! OH RAPTURE! ......oh shit.

We experienced every emotion known to humanity. Excitement, horror, happiness, ultimate stress. Packing and cleaning and purging...we had only two weeks...preparations to move four people (me, husband, two daughters aged 8 and almost 5 years) from Orlando, FL to The north bay area of San Francisco, CA.

Across the country. We had eight days to do it. EIGHT DAYS. We chose to drive. We packed my parent's Honda Odyssey (Thanks Mommy and Daddy!) and a Uhaul trailer full of stuff we thought we couldn't live without (although every time I unpack a box, I can't help but think that most of it could have been left behind).

We left behind all friends and family. Yes, there is social media. Yes, there is live chatting with webcams. Heck my phone is smart enough to do all of that! It is still not the same.

Humans need physical contact. Some more than others, but time with family and friends is biologically necessary. I don't doubt that we will meet new people and make new friends....I just hate the transition period.

Feelings of doubt and uncertainty take over, mixed with loneliness and laced with stress make for bad times.

Yes, I know it gets better. Yes I know this too shall pass.... It still sucks and words don't help. We need actual help.

End if blog post? Nope. I shall leave you with hope. We are not in total despair. By the grace of God, a friend of mine from high school lives one hour from us! We have her and her wife to thank for Thanksgiving leftovers (we arrived in California on Thanksgiving), and watching the kids one evening while husband and I went to an adults-only work event.

More to come. Slowly, as we find some semblance of a routine.

My Baptism

This Saturday at Coastal Community Church I am going to be baptized.  The time is right for me in my path with God.  And it happens to be Easter, too.  A great time to do it!

"But, I thought you were Catholic?" you might ask.  "Weren't you baptized as a baby?  And confirmed in seventh grade?"

"Yes I was."  I will answer.  And I am glad my parents did that.  I am also thankful that I was raised in the church.  Catholic school, however is another story ;)

So as a German-Polish Jew (heritage only) who was raised a Catholic, married a Protestant and takes our family to a non-denominational community church (which I LOVE), I am called in this stage of life to become baptized.

May God Bless me and my path with Him!

p.s. I believe this post is my 101st blog post!

The light at the end of the tunnel...

We are more than half way through "self-induced poverty" and doing well!  It has been a struggle, but we are surviving.  We have run out of our frozen raw milk and trying to decide if I should go and get some the next time orders are due....  I actually got Publix milk (half gallon), mostly just for cooking, and tasted it...YUCK YUCK GROSS YUCK!!!  It was not past it's expiration date and tasted HORRIBLE!  I am NOT drinking that stuff again!  I posted it on Facebook and people reminded me that almond milk exists...duh :P I could have gotten some almonds and made my own milk! I DO have a wonderful Blentec blender from my awesome MIL (Thanks Star!) that I HAVE made almond milk in - successfully, might I add ;)

But besides that - and my husband is sick of oatmeal - we have been home (okay, we have a bit of cabin fever...yes it happens in Florida), not going many places, walking more, enjoying each other and the kids more, taking it easy, catching up with housework and homeschool work. 

Patrick and I have also been loosing weight so much and so noticeably that we had to get new pants a couple of weeks ago.  I went from a size 14 to a 10!  And he went from 42 to 38, and even those are now loose!  So when poverty is over - which is only a couple of paychecks away (we're so excited!!) - we need new clothes :)

And I get a new vacuum, because my current one is being held together by duct tape and hot glue....really.

Extreme Savings mode begins....

Starting later this week, we are starting three months of  "Extreme Savings Mode."  We were calling it "self-induced poverty" but that sounded too depressing.  What is this exactly?  It is a controlled experiment with our family to pay down our debts (mostly credit cards).  All of our debts would have been paid off sometime next year, but we wouldn't have any fun in the mean time.  So instead we decided to hunker down and pay off much more in a quicker time frame, thus ending our debt (except for our house payment) sooner!  What does this mean for us? 

• We are going to be driving one car instead of two.  We will NOT be driving unless it is to the store for food shopping every other week.  
• Chiropractic will probably go from once per week to every other week.  
• Music Together class - we will finish out this session but not continue until the summer. 
• I will not be picking up food at the Co-op in Orlando until June.
• No extracurricular activities (for me or my husband or children)
• No field trips unless we can walk there.  Might also have to miss a few Park Days.
• Walking to the park or library (Thank God they are pretty close!)
• ABSOLUTELY NO EATING OUT!

This is scheduled to end in June.  At that time our credit debt will be zero, our cars both paid off, and we will be able to afford to replace a few things in our house! (like a vacuum, power tools, and a kitchen ;)

We can ultimately thank Dave Ramsey and those who we know have taken his classes in financial freedom. 

Wish us luck!!  I really want need a new vacuum ;)  My current one is being held together (I use the term very loosely) by duck tape and hot glue....

Deep in the Heart....

....OF TEXAS!!!!!  This is where we shall be in the future for a time, then back home again, jiggity-jig.  My husband's paternal Grandfather is turning 90 years old...so the whole family (well, a lot of them) are gathering to celebrate.  Because of the insanity with the scanners at airports and Mamas being harassed for breastfeeding on planes (as I plan to do) and it might end up being cheaper to drive it anyway...WE ARE DRIVING TO TEXAS!  Two parents, a five year old, and an almost two year old......Family of four in my parent's van (thanks Mom and Dad!) from here to there....I think I can...I think I can...I think I can...with lots of books and snacks, and a DVD player for the car, we should be able to survive....right?

Latest Updates in a Mama's life

Dang it!  Time got away from me again and Life handed me way too much to do....well, honestly, I guess I found too much to do...crazy days....

So here is my quick list of what has happened (I know I will leave things out just because it is late and I really should be in bed...):

We have started - and continued - homeschooling our five year old and have been loving that decision :D  If I haven't mentioned it before, we are using Oak Meadow, a Waldorf based school.  It has curriculum and educational tools for K-High School and are really liking

We have not been going to the chiropractor weekly and I am feeling it :(  I hope to be able to get back to it in a few months, though ;)


I went to the Florida La Leche League Conference last weekend...well, just Friday and Saturday, and for just a day and a half instead of three days.  I was there with Sandy Jamieson and Sandy Hill, my ladies full of lactation wisdom.

And I killed three chickens (not our own!) at a friend's "Meat Harvest"...got the war-wounds to prove it!  It was something that I have been thinking about for a while and am in a place in my psyche/life that I can/could/did do it.  One more small step away from the grid....and I will be there again for more "Harvesting" next Sunday!

Confessions of a Homeschooling Mama

There are great days and there are not so great days.  I have only schooled The Older three days and already we have had both.  The first day, we - Mama, Dada, The Older, and The Younger - went to the beach...it was called Paradise Beach, with a park/playground, beautiful sand and it is the only beach in the south part of my county to be staffed year-round with lifeguards.  If it wasn't so far away, we would be there more often. 

When we got in the water, the lifeguard (Georgie) came over and commented on how wonderful that I was using a Fuzzibinz cloth diaper (she used them on her kids years ago) on my littlest and we talked about homeschooling and natural mothering things.  Would have liked to talk to her more but had to watch The Younger because she was getting pummeled by the rough waves (and liking it).

It was unfortunately way too hot to play on the playground (all the equipment was burning from sun exposure), but vowed to come back when the weather cooled off.  But they had a wonderful playground, kids swings and toddler swings, slides, and a large resin boulder with rock climbing handles on it!  So cool!

But not all is so wonderful.  The first week, we are learning to make the capital letter A correctly.  Up until now, she would make good letter As the right way, but lately, she has been getting sloppy....and refusing to accept that the way she had always been making As was correct....

Ah, joys of life!

Next Chapter

I am about to embark on a new adventure: Homeschooling....a five year old...with an 18 month old in the wings.  At least I have a fantastic support group to help!  (Hey Ladies!)

Since before my husband and I got married, we decided that if we were still living in this area when we had kids, we would homeschool.  We talked about it, defended our position, chose friends that had the same mindset, got info from our family that does homeschool, found a good starting curriculum, planned out the next few months, got school supplies.....  and I am scared sh!tless...  because it is just around the corner!  We are finally here!

But like I said: fantastic support group, et all shall get me through it!  Woo hoo!  Yeehaw!  Here we go.....

Knee-jerk reaction

I have a knee-jerk reaction to all things Mama related: pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, child-rearing...  Every time I hear another mother being oppressed or told misinformation, my first reaction is to fight someone!  Or let loose a barrage of tips to the Mother, "Have you tried...?" or "Did you know...?"  But I must refrain, and find just one or two things - helpful and doable - for that Mother to say or do to get control back in her life. 

I JUST WANT TO SAVE THE WORLD!!

...or just a reasonable portion of it...

But the truth of the matter is: there IS a revolution happening...we just aren't physically feeling it yet...It is only online, on the internet, on Facebook, on Twitter...we are socializing without shaking hands or hugging...or kneeing someone....

I don't know if that is better or not, but different from those in the past.

Dehydrator Lust

I....have dehydrator lust.  I admit it!  I just got this email from a great blogger and want it bad.  But instead of trying to convince my self that I need it now, I will just enter the contest to get one (go ahead, you can too! you KNOW you want to ;) then go and feed my chickens.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Keeper of the Home: Naturally Inspired Living for the Christian Homemaker

1000th Post Party Giveaway: Deluxe Excalibur 3900 9-Tray Dehydrator ($220 Value)

It's been a hard secret to keep, but at last I can announce that after the smashing success of our Excalibur Dehydrator giveaway last fall, it's time to give away another one!
I've owned a 9-Tray Excalibur for about a year and a half now. I keep it on my kitchen counter the way that most people have a microwave or toaster oven. Yes, I use it almost that often!
As someone who uses my dehydrator so extensively, I can't imagine going back to the cheaper model I used to have. This is the ultimate dehydrator. It is absolutely top-notch and I cannot say enough good things about it.

In my previous review, I mentioned the main reasons that I chose to go with an Excalibur Dehydrator in particular:

1. Large, square shaped trays (as opposed to round with a hole in the center). The means no more wonky-shaped fruit leather. No more grains falling through the cracks into the dehydrator motor. Less wasted space in arranging items on the tray.
2. Adjustable trays. You can remove the tray above if you're drying something tall to give it more space. You can remove all of the trays to do something like mason jars with yogurt, or for rising bread. You can remove the bottom half of the trays to do pint sized jars of yogurt and still keep drying nuts or herbs or fruit on the upper trays. The possibilities are endless!
3. Trays that slide out through the front. With a round dehydrator, I had to lift off all of the top trays in order to access something in the middle or on the bottom. With the front access, I can just open it up and pull out the exact tray that I want to see.
4. A heating/fan unit along the back, rather than down at the bottom. This allows for more even heating of the entire dehydrator and items that finish more or less at the same time.

Read the rest of my previous review.

There are so many things that I use my dehydrator for! These days, the most common is probably for making crispy nuts (nuts that are soaked and then dried). I also use it frequently for making granola, for soaking and dehydrating oats for granola bars, for drying herbs or vegetables, for making dried apples or pears or fruit leathers, for making "cheese" crackers... just to name a few.
One additional feature about the model that is being given away is a 26 hour adjustable timer, so that you can set the dehydrator to turn off while you are out or during the night, so that you don't over-dry things or waste energy! This is new since I bought mine, but it would be such a handy feature to have!
To learn more about my thoughts on the Excalibur Dehydrator, definitely check out my review.
Another great place to learn more is in this promotional video. I wanted to embed it into this post, but wasn't able to. It's worth clicking through and visiting their website, though, so that you can get more of a feel for how the dehydrator functions and what makes it unique.

So who wants to win themselves a Deluxe Excalibur 3900 9-Tray Dehydrator ($220 value)?

To streamline giveaways a bit more, we are experimenting with a new system. Rather than leaving multiple comments to get all of your extra entries, simply click on the link below and complete one survey, checking off the entry options that you have completed! That's it!

Click Here to Enter the Giveaway!

Giveaway ends Friday, June 25th at 4pm PST.

Plan for the Future...

It would be great to have one of those!  And time to do so :)  I did recently have 24 hours to myself, away from everyone, got to do things by myself...it was weird and wonderful at the same time.  It was a gift from my husband - he watched the girls, they did fine - and I got to catch up on a bit of reading and TV watching (we don't have live TV in the house, so I watched it in the hotel room...still nothing on!  So glad we don't have cable or dish or whatever :). 

I did get to start planning for the immediate future of homeschooling my 4 1/2 year old which is starting in August.  I have the first day of school planned: we are going to the beach!  Hopefully all day or at least most of it.  After that...well... I have curriculum from Oak Meadow that I will be working from.  And this first year (kindergarten) is really practice anyway.  If I can homeschool this year, I can homeschool all the years!  Of course, now that I think about it, that will be (in total with both girls) 17 years at least!!  wow.... but let's just try the first year and not think of the rest....

And in my immediate future (this month), enjoy Mother's Day, shop for shelves, purge, reduce, and clean my house...without a working vacuum.....and get backyard chickens...I wonder how much grass two chickens can eat?  (my lawnmower is not working...)

Follow-up to "My 3-hour-tour..." 2009

Last year, I gave birth to my second daughter.  It was beautiful and wonderful!  And it was at home!  My midwife discovered a vaginal cyst and it was decided to go to the hospital for quick removal and then back home....three days later (!) we left the hospital.  Read my postpartum story here. 

Go ahead.  I will wait.  Get yourself a drink and read it if you haven't before.

Why did I have elevated liver enzymes?  They never could figure it out...  I went to another GI doc as an outpatient and he wanted me to have more tests done...SCREW THAT!  I never had it done.

Then today I came across this article on shower curtains and volatile organic compounds (VOCs).  And I remember reading something many months ago (1, 2, and 3 different articles - I can't find what I did read originally) about how VOCs can cause a variety of problems, including elevated liver enzymes. 

The key element in this is that I bought two new shower curtains - one for my shower and one for my bed - for the birth.  I had been exposed to VOCs without even knowing it!  And that, I believe, raised my liver enzymes, causing an unnecessary problem of me being in the hospital for three agonizing days!!  It kills me because I carefully chose a no-VOC paint to use in the bathroom just shortly before the birth.

I currently have a shower curtain from IKEA that is either low- or no-VOC, so I hope I don't have to worry about that....just wish I had time and energy to clean my bathtub ;)

And here we are...

Daciana, my second child, will be one year old this Thursday.  I could continue with a cliche, like "time flies," but I already did that.  I have tried to be in the moment with her as much as I could, trying to balance my attention with everyone else in the house.  It is very hard.  

I have talked to other Mamas about maternal guilt and they have all encouraged me to know I am doing the best I can and to not let guilt have any of my precious time.  This is also a hard thing.

Advice has been given to "Make time for yourself."  This is possibly the hardest thing to even think of.

I know that Motherhood is a very difficult position for a woman to be in.  I chose this.  I wanted this.  I got it, I am in it.  I love my girls, and at times, they are very....challenging.  Life is constantly testing me.  Right now, I feel like I am failing.  I have a wonderfully crafted sickness that involves much mucus and constantly hacking up a lung, which lowers my energy to zero.  Mothers don't get sick days - we don't have the time!  I am already behind on everything, why do I have to get sick now?  *cough*cough*wheeeeze*

I know.  I can hear you yelling, "This is just a test!  You can pass it!"  And then along comes an email from a dear friend (here is an excerpt):

------------

"We really need moms just like you, the ones who have had such diverse challenges and experiences, and are setting such a good examples for other moms to follow. It gives them hope and faith that breastfeeding and committed mothering really do work and payoff with great rewards.

"It’s my pleasure and privilege to be with you and the girls ~ they are such precious angels and YOU are such a wonderful role model of good mothering. I have used you and [Daciana] as good examples of kangaroo mothering many times.  The time I spent with you at the LLL [La Leche League] conference seemed miraculous ~ I’ve never been around a baby for that long w/out hearing them cry ~ multiple times.  {I wish I’d known about it when I was a young mom.}

"I think you’re probably really wise to realize that the meeting environment can be a challenge for Anastasia ~ I wish more moms were as tuned in to their children’s needs as you are!!!  This world would be a much better place."

------------

I took the girls to the last La Leche League meeting which was at night and kind of last minute, so no time to prepare Anastasia in my expectations of her, and since we are no longer a breastfeeding pair (it's all for Daciana now), she didn't have anything to do or look forward to.  It got a little crazy.  There were lots of little babies and she wanted to play with them all like she does her one year old sister.  So we left the meeting early after I warned her many times to chill out.  Future LLL meetings will also become another Daddy-Daughter night.

God only gives you what He knows you can handle.  I know this to be true because I am still alive.  My life - and all its "adventures" - has made me stronger, and I don't think I am done yet.  At least I hope not.

TA-DA!

New look for a new year...may still tweak it a bit here or there but i think this will be it for a while :)

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2010 !!!!!!

And now, for your Moment of Holiday Zen...

"Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn, or consumed. Happiness is
the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude."
~ Denis Waitley

Cloth Diaper and Babywearing Class

Cloth Diaper and Babywearing Class

Who: Expectant Parents, Moms and Dads, Doulas, Grandparents, and anyone interested in Cloth Diapering
What: Cloth Diaper and Babywearing Class
When: Saturday, December 19, 2009 at 11:00 am OR 4:00 pm (each class is 2 hours)
Where: 59 Barton Ave, in Rockledge, FL 32955 (St Mary's Youth House)
How Much: $20 per couple

You are invited to Cloth Diapering 101!  Confused by the vast world of Cloth Diapering?  Not sure what it will cost?  Which diapering system is right for you?  Bring all your questions and learn about diapering you baby with cloth.  Also, get a chance to see different baby carriers, from the Moby wrap to the Maya sling and the Baby Bjorn and more!

The cost for class is $20 for two people (couple, birth partners, Mom-to-be and doula, or any other "2-person" combination).  You will receive one booklet of information on Cloth Diapering full of resources. 

PLEASE RESERVE YOUR SPOT NOW! Classes fill up fast! Contact Eva Algermissen via email - BY DEC 16 - to reserve your spot for one of the classes on Saturday, December 19, at either 11:00 am OR 4:00 pm.  Both classes will be held at St Mary's Youth House located at 59 Barton Ave, in Rockledge, FL 32955. 

Lap babies welcome - please no children.  (Snack provided)

Eva Algermissen
algermissenmama@gmail.com
MamaEvaUSA.blogspot.com
"Find me on Facebook!"

Next year

I plan on changing the look of this blog to something else...not sure what, but I think it needs to be done.  Right after bathing the dag ;o)

I may also start another blog for Space Coast BirthNetwork, which used to be Brevard BirthNetwork, but that is a story for the future....

"Trees are nice..."

For many reasons, my husband and I decided to homeschool. Our oldest is 4 so now we are investigating all our options. I am part of a Mom's Book Club which used to be a playgroup and is becoming a homeschooling group. We had a Nature Project at one mom's house last month and I volunteered to do the next one here at my house. I really love to teach those who want to learn. Especially things I am interested in :)

This month, the topic is "Trees." Broad subject, I know, but I am trying to keep it simple. 'Tis the season so we will be making Christmas trees out of construction paper and decorating them in addition to other activities. I am posting a few videos here so I don't have to look for them later :)







There. That should do it....